Falling in love is like coming home. Your worries are quieted and you feel protected in your partner’s arms. The man you give your heart to just feels right.
So you’ve found someone, and it’s been going well. In a relationship, you basically have two options: to marry your significant other, or to break up with them – no pressure guys. Call me unrealistic, but I feel like you shouldn’t settle either. I feel like if you’re going to be in love with someone and potentially marry them, they should make you feel like no other love you’ve ever felt before.
I know it’s not realistic to expect a mind-blowing, insanely perfect relationship every hour of every day (trust me, there will be bad days), but I think that being in a serious relationship means that you want to progress with that person and potentially even marry them if that’s what you have planned for yourself. Here are some ways that I think prove you’ve found the person you’re going to marry. Love-Advice-101, ladies, and gentlemen.
There’s one thing we’re all chasing after. One force that trumps money, power or reason, and that very closely dictates the kind of people we become. And it’s love.
When you’re deep in love, it’s hard not to picture the rest of your life with that other person. But how do we know for certain that it’s real forever and not just a current fantasy?
Perhaps we’re a little old-fashioned, but we like to believe that marriage — for better or for worse — is sacred for life. Here are the nine signs you’ve found the man you want to spend the rest of your life with:
1. Your happiness lies in his happiness, and her in yours
You know he’s the one because he’s good to you in ways that you’ve never thought possible. He wants what’s best for you, even if it comes at a cost to him.
The man you marry gives selflessly, as your interests are now his interests. In fact, he thinks he’s being selfish when he indulges in you because it brings him pleasure, too.
To that end, he can balance ambitions at work with ambitions at home. Some stages or careers are more difficult than others, but he finds ways to let you know he hasn’t forgotten about you.
2. He builds with you, not for you.
He will never say, “You wouldn’t have this if it weren’t for me” because he works with you, as a team.
Together, you build for your futures, not separately. He only wants what is best for you because it’s what is best for him, too.
3. You’re Willing to Work Through Anything and Everything Together
This is important. You cannot marry somebody who isn’t willing to always try and work things out with you. Life gets hard sometimes. Things happen and you and your significant other will run into problems about your relationship, guaranteed. The difference between a temporary relationship and serious, possibly-get-married type of relationship is the fact that you and your partner are willing to work things out, no matter what. Some of the conversations will be uncomfortable and some of them will make you cry – but, you need to work through the hard things to ever experience the good times.
4. It’s Easy to Imagine Growing Old With This Person
Not to be weird, but I can’t wait to be a little old lady with my boyfriend (future husband) by my side. He’s the only person I’ve ever dated that I could picture growing up with. Life is crazy and we meet so many different people. I can’t imagine having a family, retiring and getting older with anyone else. Make sure you find someone you can imagine this with because it might become a reality.
5. You want to share every experience with him
When you envision your future, he has a major role in it (and vice versa). The idea of spending the rest of your life with him doesn’t scare you. Being by his side is where you feel most comfortable.
When something funny happens or you receive good news, you immediately want to share it with him first. When a cheesy love song comes through your headphones, you instinctively think of him.
From what he ate for lunch to what he’s currently watching on television, you’re interested in all that he does. And, while you sometimes hate to admit this, you’re more inclined to do something if he’s part of it. That’s just what companionship is to you.
6. You Have Similar Living Habits
It’d be difficult to live with someone who is messy if you’re super organized, or a night owl if you’re a morning person. It’s not impossible, but it’s so much easier to live with someone who shares similar major habits with you. Sure, you two may not match up 100% of the time with everything, but if they’re understanding and you both are willing to compromise on things, it’ll be smooth sailing.
7. You love more than you fight
It never feels good to fight because you care too much about him to hurt him. The compromise always seems like the best option because you both can be happy. But at the end of the day, you really can’t stay mad at each other for long.
8. They’re Your Number One Fan, and You are Theirs
I don’t even think you can be in a normal relationship with someone who doesn’t fully support the things that you want in life, let alone marry them. Don’t settle for someone who doesn’t give you their full support. Even if your dreams seem silly, even if your goals seem out of reach – your partner should always support you 100%. Find someone who’s your number one fan, and marry TF out of them.
9. But, You Also Plan Realistic Things Together
My boyfriend and I have also planned out the type of bookshelf we need in our future house. Glamorous? No. Possible to fulfill so I can live like Belle from Beauty and the Beast? Yes.
10. They Like Your Seriously Weird Quirks and Habits
You shouldn’t feel like you need to change the little things about who you are as a person in order to make your significant other happy. In fact, you should never change who you are to make someone else happy. The person you marry should accept the fact that you hate wearing pants (me) or that sometimes, in order to ground yourself on a stressful day, you need to lay down on the floor for a few hours (also me). The person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with will love the things about you that other people may find “weird.”
11. The Love Between You isn’t Selfish
You love each other without condition, and you don’t expect anything in return. Being in love with someone means that you want the best for them, not just the best for yourself, and I think that that’s important to know because you can’t base any relationship on self-centered needs and expect it to thrive. You realize that your relationship is a partnership, not just one-sided and both of you need to be happy in order for it to grow.
12. The attraction is palpable
Physically, emotionally and mentally, you two are compatible on all those levels. The chemistry between you both is powerful enough to block everything else out. Sometimes it feels like it’s just him that really matters.
Even doing the littlest things together, such as running to the grocery store, feel more special because he’s around. The attraction is pervasive from the bedroom to the most platonic of places, like the doctor’s office. You can’t keep your hands off each other and you certainly aren’t holding back.
13. He accepts you as you are
You’re messier, louder and maybe less funny, but he loves you for it. He makes you feel good about all those things you might dislike about yourself.
And he brags about you to his friends because he’s so proud to call you his own. You would brag more, except everyone already knows how enamored you are.
He knows everything about you — good and bad — and appreciates both because it’s all part of who you are.
You are his, he is yours and suddenly it all feels comfortingly simple.